5 Questions Everyone In Their Mid-20s Needs To Be Asking Themselves

1. Is everybody hanging out without me, or is this just what life becomes?

No matter how amicable or social you once were, it’s hard to keep the connections tight.  Everything is relegated to the weekends.  The people we used to see everyday, we talk to once a week if we’re lucky.  Where’d everybody go?

2. Should I travel more?

YOLO and FOMO have probably given airline companies extravagant profit margins after the youth picked up these two concepts.  “You only live once” and “fear of missing out” makes me feel like my death is extremely imminent, and I should go do things they did in the “Bucket List” RIGHT NOW.  I would argue that RELATIVELY young people are the most susceptible to social comparison (because we don’t know that it doesn’t matter yet).  That plus our innate curiosity makes us want to explore everything.  And there are only so many years in my twenties.  10 to be exact.  And almost 6 are gone.  I better go to Africa soon.

3. Am I No Longer Young and Beautiful?

Things that never used to hurt suddenly require Bengay.  The gut is harder to get rid of.  There is more of a feeling of heaviness as the lightless of youth falls away.  We’re supposed to have $______, supposed to have these credentials, supposed to work this many hours, supposed to get married eventually…  I guess you’re not that young anymore!

4. Do I love what I’m doing?

Mid twenties is the last call for shots.  If you stay on this train, you know you’re probably going all the way.  All the other potential careers beckon you to a life potentially more exciting, but a lot riskier as well.  Is this what you want to spend your life doing?  What excites you?  And in a related topic…

5. Is he/she the one?

In “End of Watch”, Jake Gyllenhal doesn’t know whether or not to get married and his BFF Mexican partner said something like “I took my girl to prom, nailed it, and right after that I proposed.  How did I know if she was the one?  My dad asked me if I could live without her and I said yes. And that’s how I knew.”

Ultimately, all of this merely contributes to the one simple question that subsumes everything else.

6. Am I living the life that I want to live?

Credit: ASTON TSUI

The Bouncing Zone Strategy — Part 2

Introduction

Your are about to read the part 2 of a 3 part article called "the bouncing zone strategy".

Have you tried to find zones on your charts? If so, you certainly noticed that not all of them work as planned. Well, I have a good news for you: it’s possible to filter out some of the zones that are most likely to fail.

Before talking about what makes a zone good or bad, we should first understand what are the characteristics of a zone. That’s what we’re going to talk about here. Each section below deals about one of the characteristics of a zone.

Name of the zone

You already know the first characteristic of a zone, it’s simply the name of the zone. Is either a supply zone, or a demand zone.

Okay, now let’s talk about things you don’t know yet :-)

Type of zone

We can divide the zones into 4 different types:

• Drop Base Rally (DBR)
• Rally Base Drop (RBD)
• Drop Base Drop (DBD)
• Rally Base Rally (RBR)

This sounds weird? Here's an image that should make things clear.

This is simply a way to describe the "direction" of the zone.

Strength of the move

When price leaves a zone, it’s important to know how to describe the strength of the move. For this we have 2 useful things to look at:

• How many consecutive candles of the same color there are
• How big the candles are

If you have lots of big candles of the same color, it’s a strong level. If you have only a couple of small candles of the same color, it’s a slow level. You can see below a slow move (left) and a strong one (right).

Time in the zone

This one is simple: once you draw the zone, count how many candles there are in the zone. If you see more than 5 candles, then it's a long zone. Is there are less than 5, then it's a short zone.

In the example below you can count 3 candles, so it's a fast zone.

Height of the zone

Look at the height of your zone, then look at the height of your price movement. If the zone is bigger than 1/4 of the price movement, then the zone is big. Otherwise, the zone is small.

In the example below, the left zone is big, the right zone is small.

Freshness of the zone

You need to follow 2 steps in order to know if a zone is fresh or not:

• Look on the left of the zone, and see if your price movement is due to a previous zone being hit.
• Look on the right of the zone, and see if the the price already hit the zone at least once.

It’s easier to explain with an example:

Is the zone 2 fresh?

• On the left, we do not see a prvious zone at 1
• On the right, price touched the zone at 3
• -> The zone was fresh before hitting 3, but now it is not fresh anymore

Is the zone 4 fresh?

• On the left, we do not see a previous zone
• On the right, price did not touch the zone yet
• -> The zone is fresh

Quick summary

As we just saw, there are 6 characteristics to think about when describing a zone:

• Name of the zone: supply, demand
• Type of zone: DBR, RBD, DBD, RBR
• Strength of the move: strong, medium, slow
• Time in the zone: short, long
• Height of the zone: small, big
• Freshness of the zone: yes, no

All of this is really important, you should keep it in mind while looking for zones

Some examples

Now it’s time to see some examples together. Below are 2 zones, try to describe them using what we learnt in the article.

Characteristics of the left zone:

• Name of the zone: supply
• Type of zone: DBD
• Strength of the move: strong
• Time in the zone: short
• Height of the zone: small
• Freshness of the zone: not fresh anymore

Characteristics of the right zone:

• Name of the zone: demand
• Type of zone: DBR
• Strength of the move: strong
• Time in the zone: short
• Height of the zone: small
• Freshness of the zone: not fresh (you can see another level on the left of the zone)

Now you should practice describing zones on your own charts.

Credit: 21pips

Trading Recommendation December 12

Fundamental Analysis
S&P Downgrades US Growth Forecast ; RBNZ Increases New Zealand Growth Forecast!

Standard & Poor's credit ratings agency has lowered its U.S. growth forecast warning of "significant downside risks" from federal spending cuts.

To read the full trading recommendation, please click this link: http://metisetrade.com/index.php/research

Technical Analysis
USDCHF Breached the Long Term Weekly Chart! Sell in Sight

Today we are going to take a look at USDCHF known as the Swissy. The pair is widely known to be a safety trade and is closely linked to the prices of EURUSD (although inversely related, meaning as EURUSD goes up, USDCHF goes down). As we can see from the weekly chart prices have broke down the lows of the consolidation phase that started way back in September 2011.

To read the full trading recommendation, please click this link: http://metisetrade.com/index.php/research

The Bouncing Zone Strategy — Part 1

Introduction

Your are about to read the part 1 of a 3 part article called "the bouncing zone strategy".

You should know that I haven't invented this strategy. I've learned it on the internet and with friends, and then tweaked it to feet my needs. Some people call this strategy "supply and demand levels", but I think "bouncing zones" better describe what it's about.

The setup

This is a strategy based on Price Action, so the setup is quite simple: just the price in candle sticks. No indicator at all. I trade mostly on the main pairs (EUR/USD, GBP/USD, etc.), and on a 1h timeframe (TF). But this technique should work on any pair and any TF.

The basic idea

Sometimes we see price moving very rapidly in one direction. What does it mean? Let's use an example to make things simple:

• Some people are selling a huge amount of $currency, and these "some people" are usually big banks
• That makes the price drop quickly from 1.3 to 1.2
• It means that a lot of people who wanted to sell $currency at around 1.3 couldn't do so, since price moved so fast
• So next time the price goes back around 1.3, a lot of sell orders are going to be triggered, and price is going to move down again
• Of course it works the opposite if price increased from 1.2 to 1.3

Once you realise that, you just have to use this information at your advantage. Here's a EUR/USD chart that shows this.

Legend:

• 1) Price dropped quickly from here, we call this a zone
• 2) Then when the price reaches back the same zone, the price bounce

Now you should understand why we call this strategy "bouncing zones". The zones from where price move quickly in one direction are called:

• Demand zone, when people want to buy and price will increase
• Supply zone, when people want to sell and price will go down (like in the example chart above)

So you just have to identify these supply and demand zones, place orders when the price goes back into these zones, and wait for the price to bounce. Obviously not all zones are going to work as planned. But from my experience, enough are going to work in our favor to make this system work, and make money.

How to identify bouncing zones

Identifying zones is quite easy. All it takes is two steps:

• 1) On a chart, identify all strong price movement
• 2) Find the base of the price movement, where the price moves slowly in sideways. This is what we call a zone.

In the example below we see 3 strong price movement. There is a supply zone that already worked, and a new demand zone.

You can see that it's quite easy to do!

How to precisely draw zones

This part is hard to explain precisely, cause there may be some rules to follow, but your also need some kind of instinct, that you can only learn by doing. Drawing zones is an "art". Anyway, the basic idea is this:

• Look at the base of a strong price movement to find some candles moving sideways
• Make the zone cover all of these candles (body and shadows)
• Then refine your zone:
  • If it's a supply zone, you do not care about the lower shadows of the candles
  • If it's a demand zone, you do not care about the upper shadows of the candles

Here are a few examples of zone drawing:

Legend:

• In blue + orange: the whole zone that covers all the candles
• In orange: the shadows we're not interested in, as explained above
• In blue: the refined zone to use for the trade

Entry, stop loss and take profit

Once you identify a zone that you want to trade, you have to set up the trade. Here's how I do it with a little example.

Legend:

• Blue rectangle: the supply zone
• Blue line: the entry of the trade, at the beginning of the zone
• Red line: the stop loss (SL), usually 2-3 pipes above the end of the zone
• Green line: the take profit (TP), that is simply placed in a way to have a 1:2 or 1:3 risk:reward ratio (in this example it's a 1:3)

So once you know how to draw zones, setting up trades is really simple with these rules.

Examples of bouncing zones

Below are 4 examples of bouncing zones from CHF/JPY charts. Two are demand zones (top), and two are supply zones (bottom).

You should try to find zones on your own charts, and see the price bouncing into them

Credit: 21pips

How to Trade Forex with Ichimoku: The Core System

We have come a long way learning about ichimoku. In this article about the indicator, I will teach you how to trade forex using ichimoku to anticipate, ride, and profit with the trend.

Ichimoku is a trend following system. Because of that, it only make sense to use it and learn it for trend following. I’m not saying that its all the ichimoku indicator could do. It is just the first step to getting to know this indicator. You can use ichimoku on any kind of strategy you want on any timeframe and on any market. I have been using ichimoku as a contrarian trader and not as a trend trader. But all traders new to this indicator should first learn how to trade with ichimoku with trend following. That is my beginning. That should be yours too.

The First Step – Anticipation

The first step to using ichimoku lies in the fact that you should be able to anticipate if a new trend is going to rise. We want the big trends. And we should be able to get on it before it even begins. We want these trends to last for days, months if possible. So how do we anticipate it?

Consider this graph:

If the 3 lines agree that the trend is going bearish, there is a high chance that a reversal is near. When the kijun sen and tenkan sen lines cross, it means a reversal. If after the cross, the tenkan sen is below the kijun sen, it is bearish. Otherwise, it is bullish. Both kijun and tenkan also points down. Which means its strongly bearish. Now, look at our chikou line. Is it above or below the price action? If its below, then it is bearish. Is it below the cloud or above the cloud? If below the cloud, then it is STRONGLY bearish.

In summary:

• Tenkan sen below kijun – bearish
• Chikou below price action – bearish
• Tenkan sen pointing down – bearish
• Kijun sen pointing down – bearish
• Chikou below kumo cloud – strongly bearish
• Kumo cloud – price action inside – consolidate (chance of breakout if the price goes down and exit the cloud. Chance of trend continuing up if the price exits the cloud upward).

When all the lines agree. There’s a high probability that the trend will go on that direction.

And as anticipated, the lines did prove to be accurate:

Following the indicator, you could have made profit around 300 – 500 pip for one position alone or more if you keep on adding position as the trend go down. The trend went for months going bearish. You could have also anticipated the trend reversing using the same technique you used entering the trade.

This is the first step in using the ichimoku indicator for trend following. On our next lesson, I’ll teach you how you can use the indicator to add position as the trend unfolds.

Now that you know how to anticipate a trend. Go practice it! Create a demo account or a live account from our list of forex brokers and social trading site. Practice makes perfect. There is no shortcut to success.

(C) Forex Philippines

Mark Twain’s Top 9 Tips for Living a Kick-Ass Life

Mark Twain’s Top 9 Tips for Living a Kick-Ass Life

You may know Mark Twain for some of his very popular books, but what you may not know is how much of a bad ass he was at living life. Here are a few tips for living an awesome life from Mark Twain.

“It’s no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense.”

“Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.”

“When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it’s a sure sign you’re getting old.”

You may know Mark Twain for some of his very popular books like Adventures of Huckleberry Finn and The Adventures of Tom Sawyer. He was a writer and also a humorist, satirist and lecturer.

Twain is known for his many – and often funny – quotes. Here are a few of my favourite tips from him.

1. Approve of yourself.

“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”

If you don’t approve of yourself, of your behaviour and actions then you’ll probably walk around most of the day with a sort of uncomfortable feeling. If you, on the other hand, approve of yourself then you tend to become relaxed and gain inner freedom to do more of what you really want.

This can, in a related way, be a big obstacle in personal growth. You may have all the right tools to grow in some way but you feel an inner resistance. You can’t get there.

What you may be bumping into there are success barriers. You are putting up barriers in your own mind of what you may or may not deserve. Or barriers that tell you what you are capable of. They might tell you that you aren’t really that kind of person that could this thing that you’re attempting.

Or if you make some headway in the direction you want to go you may start to sabotage for yourself. To keep yourself in a place that is familiar for you.

So you need give yourself approval and allow yourself to be who you want to be. Not look for the approval from others. But from yourself. To dissolve that inner barrier or let go of that self-sabotaging tendency. This is no easy task and it can take time.

2. Your limitations may just be in your mind.

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.”

So many limitations are mostly in our minds. We may for instance think that people will disapprove because we are too tall, too old or balding. But these things mostly matter when you think they matter. Because you become self-conscious and worried about what people may think.

And people pick up on that and may react in negative ways. Or you may interpret anything they do as a negative reaction because you are so fearful of a bad reaction and so focused inward on yourself.

If you, on the other hand, don’t mind then people tend to not mind that much either. And if you don’t mind then you won’t let that part of yourself become a self-imposed roadblock in your life.

It is, for instance, seldom too late to do what you want to do.

3. Lighten up and have some fun.

“Humor is mankind’s greatest blessing.”

“Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.”

Humor and laughter are amazing tools. They can turn any serious situation into something to laugh about. They can lighten the mood just about anywhere.

And a lighter mood is often a better space to work in because now your body and mind isn’t filled to the brim with negative emotions. When you are more light-hearted and relaxed then the solution to a situation is often easier to both come up with and implement. Have a look at Lighten Up! for more on this topic.

4. Let go of anger.

“Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”

Anger is most of the time pretty pointless. It can cause situations to get out of hand. And from a selfish perspective it often more hurtful for the one being angry then the person s/he’s angry at.

So even if you feel angry at someone for days recognize that you are mostly just hurting yourself. The other person may not even be aware that you are angry at him or her. So either talking to the person and resolving the conflict or letting go of anger as quickly as possible are pretty good tips to make your life more pleasurable.

5. Release yourself from entitlement.

“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

When you are young your mom and dad may give a lot of things. As you grow older you may have a sort of entitlement. You may feel like the world should just give you what you want or that it owes you something.

This belief can cause a lot of anger and frustration in your life. Because the world may not give you what expect it to. On the other hand, this can be liberating too. You realize that it is up to you to shape your own life and for you to work towards what you want. You are not a kid anymore, waiting for your parents or the world to give you something.

You are in the driver’s seat now. And you can go pretty much wherever you want.

6. If you’re taking a different path, prepare for reactions.

“A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.”

I think this has quite a bit of relevance to self-improvement.

If you start to change or do something different than you usually do then people may react in different ways. Some may be happy for you. Some may be indifferent. Some may be puzzled or react in negative and discouraging ways.

Much of these reactions are probably not so much about you but about the person who said it and his/her life. How they feel about themselves is coming through in the words they use and judgements they make.

And that’s OK. I think it’s pretty likely that they won’t react as negatively as you may imagine. Or they will probably at least go back to focusing on their own challenges pretty soon.

So what other people may say and think and letting that hold you back is probably just fantasy and barrier you build in your mind.

You may find that when you finally cross that inner threshold you created then people around you may not shun you or go chasing after you with pitchforks.  They might just go: “OK”.

7. Keep your focus steadily on what you want.

“Drag your thoughts away from your troubles… by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.”

What you focus your mind on greatly determines how things play out. You can focus on your problems and dwell in suffering and a victim mentality. Or you can focus on the positive in situation, what you can learn from that situation or just focus your mind on something entirely else.

It may be “normal” to dwell on problems and swim around in a sea of negativity. But that is a choice. And a thought habit. You may reflexively start to dwell on problems instead of refocusing your mind on something more useful. But you can also start to build a habit of learning to gain more and more control of where you put your focus.

8. Don’t focus so much on making yourself feel good.

“The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.”

This may be a bit of a counter-intuitive tip. But as I wrote yesterday, one of the best ways to feel good about yourself is to make someone else feel good or to help them in some way.

This is a great way to look at things to create an upward spiral of positivity and exchange of value between people. You help someone and both of you feel good. The person you helped feels inclined to give you a hand later on since people tend to want to reciprocate. And so the both of you are feeling good and helping each other.

Those positive feelings are contagious to other people and so you may end up making them feel good too. And the help you received from your friend may inspire you to go and help another friend. And so the upward spiral grows and continues.

9. Do what you want to do.

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did so. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Awesome quote. And I really don’t have much to add to that one. Well, maybe to write it down and keep it as a daily reminder – on your fridge or bathroom door – of what you can actually do with your life.

Credit: HENRIK EDBERG

How to Trade Forex with Ichimoku: The Cloud

Howdy! Forex traders. It’s me again! Though I have been quiet lately, I know that I still have a lot of guides to create for you. I have been busy with life lately, and my positions on the market has been for the longer term (daily, weekly and monthly positions) so I decided not to post about my forex trades until I finished this another guide for ichimoku. But enough about me and lets talk more about the ichimoku indicator.

The Ichimoku cloud is the most noticeable piece of indicator in the Ichimoku chart. The idea behind the ichimoku cloud is that it is the resistance that we should be most aware of. It also tells us where the bias of the trend is and where it is heading.

How Clouds Are Formed?

Ichimoku clouds are formed because of the senkou span lines A and B. When A is above B, it is bullish. When B is above A, it is bearish.

How to Interpret the Ichimoku Cloud

Think of the ichimoku cloud as resistance lines. Only that they are lines with big bodies that vary at different points in time. The larger the body, the greater the resistance. The thinner is the cloud, the easier it is for the price action to break it because it represents a weaker resistance.

On our last post about the 3 lines of ichimoku, we said that the kijun lines is the heavy weight when it comes to the resistance. But the last resistance that the price must break is the cloud. If it wishes to reverse. In other words, the ichimoku cloud is the last resistance for a confirmation of a reversal. It it didn’t bounce back to the normal trend after hitting the cloud, then its probably going to reverse.

Things to remember about the ichimoku cloud

• When the price action is above the cloud, it is a bullish bias
• When the price action is below the cloud, it is a bearish bias
• When the price action is INSIDE the cloud, it is consolidating
• A cloud with a flat line is a strong resistance. The flat line is the resistance line.
• A cloud with a huge body is a strong resistance
• A cloud with a thinner body is a weak resistance

The Future Cloud

The ichimoku cloud or kumo has this idea of “future”. Consider this image.

Look at the last price action. The kumo cloud just below the last price action (yellow cloud) represents the latest price action. But looking a further to the right, there is a green cloud that looks somewhat incomplete. That is the future kumo or future cloud. It tries to predict what the next bias will be and will also try to give you a signal if there is a strong resistance is forming.

The future cloud is very important in giving us the first sign of reversal. I also look at the future cloud for the same reason and to be aware of strong resistance cloud forming. When the cloud changes in color, you are the first to know if the trend is weakening and you can decide on this information.

Conclusion

There’s a lot to take in, when you combine all the lines and the cloud altogether. And this is a good thing. Because the beauty of ichimoku indicator is that, because there are a lot of indicators for it, the lines and the kumo, you can craft a trading strategy that fits only for you. Without deviating from the core that makes it successful.

On the next post, I’ll teach you how you can combine all these indicators to create a trading strategy. And I will teach you the core trading strategy of this indicator that makes it successful.

(C) Forex Philippines

20 Important Relationship Rules That Are Often Ignored

1. Be Honest.

Be nice, but be honest. Trust is vital. Trust is gained through honesty.

2. Compromise.

There’s a complexity to compromising.  With gender roles ever evolving it’s important to recognize it’s not about who wears the pants.  It’s about balance.  Compromise is an inherent part of a relationship.  You will have to sacrifice in a relationship.  That’s the nature of relationships.  If you want your way all of the time, stay solo.  It’s about finding a healthy balance in compromise.  Both people in a relationship must understand that necessity of compromise and sacrifice in a relationship to make it work.

3. It’s healthy to argue.

It’s healthy to bicker.  It’s not healthy to have screaming matches.  Some couples brag about “never fighting.” That’s nothing to brag about.  It probably means that one of you is holding something in.

4. It’s not your job to fix the person you love.

You can’t fix them.  You can only help them fix themselves.  You can’t resolve their work issues or wipe away all of their insecurities or get their parents back together.  All you can do is be there for them and help them through it.  Getting frustrated about your inability to fix your partner will agitate their struggles and strain your relationship.

5. Understand your significant other’s background.

It is important to recognize the person you’re with has not always been that person.  They’ve gone through things to make them that person.  Appreciate and understand their past.  Put them in context.  Maybe he doesn’t express his feelings because his family is not particularly expressive, or maybe she is so insecure because her ex was very critical.  Be conscious of this.

6. Do not underestimate the power of thoughtfulness.

Listen.  Pay attention.  There is nothing more meaningful or memorable than mentioning something in passing and then having your partner bring it back up later.

7. Do not limit expressions of love to grand gestures.

It’s impossible to keep up.  Fancy dinners or luxury vacations are wonderful, but love does not have a dollar value.  If given the option between a weekly sunset walk or an annual vacation, the majority would pick the weekly walk.  Money does not show love.  Gestures show love.  A free gesture also holds value.

8. Take all advice with a grain of salt.

Rule #13 stands, nobody knows your relationship.  Advice/tips can help, but only you and your partner know what’s right for you and your partner.  Don’t take any outside material as an absolute truth.

9. Research.

If you have a relationship question or need advice, the internet/books can be helpful tools.  There is nothing wrong with getting some perspective and advice from outside sources.

10. Value each other’s interests.

If you have different interests, which is perfectly fine, make sure you value what their interests are.  Even if vintage airplanes or nail art don’t interest you, do your best to pay attention and have respect for what your partner likes.

11. If you are not getting something you need, ask for it.

Don’t be afraid to ask for what you need.  Your partner is not a mind reader.

12. Do NOT get your sex tips from Cosmo.

13. Nobody understands your relationship.

And you don’t understand anyone else’s.  There are no exceptions to this rule.

14. Follow the Harry Burns Airport Rule.

Do not stop doing things you used to do in the beginning of the relationship.  If you used to take your guy/girl to the airport, still take them.  You should never stop trying to show your significant other that you care.  Nothing is worse than hearing “How come you never ____________ anymore?”

15. Spite will get you nowhere.

If the other person hurts you in a relationship, hurting them back on purpose will likely destroy your relationship.  If you feel the need to “get back at” the person you’re with, you shouldn’t be with them.

16. Split the bills.

Relationships should be even or close to even.  It is not a romantic idea, but it is fair.  Communicate about what you each feel comfortable with.  No one person should put more effort into a relationship than the other, so no one person should put more money into a relationship.  It will allow resentment and discomfort to build.

17. Accept that no one is perfect.

It’s about finding the right person, not the perfect person.  The perfect person doesn’t exist.  Everyone has flaws.  Everyone makes mistakes.  Prince Charming probably had one beer too many on occasion.  Cinderella probably spent too much on shoes.

18. Don’t be afraid to have the tough conversations.

If the relationship is strong and going somewhere, you should bring up the tough stuff.  If you’re falling in love but have some concerns, bring them up sooner rather than later.  It’s difficult to have serious conversations but it’s better to discover deal breakers earlier on.

19. Trust your instincts.

If you feel in your gut something is wrong, bring it up.  9 times out of 10 your instincts are correct and ignoring them will get you nowhere.

20. Be wary when discussing relationship troubles with your friends.

To a certain extent, it is healthy to discuss your relationship with your friends, but be cautious.  If you discuss every little worry, every argument, if you air every grievance, you will poison your friends against your significant other.  Find a healthy way/source to vent to that won’t backfire. 

Credit: RACHEL HARRISON 

30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself

When you stop chasing the wrong things you give
the right things a chance to catch you.

As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”  Nothing could be closer to the truth.  But before you can begin this process of transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding you back.

Here are some ideas to get you started:

1. Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.  If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you.  You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot.  Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth.  And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
2. Stop running from your problems. – Face them head on.  No, it won’t be easy.  There is no person in the world capable of flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them.  We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems.  That’s not how we’re made.  In fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall.  Because that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time.  This is what ultimately molds us into the person we become.
3. Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself.  Our lives improve only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we can take is to be honest with ourselves.
4. Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. – The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too.  Yes, help others; but help yourself too.  If there was ever a moment to follow your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.
5. Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you likeeveryone else.  Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you.  Don’t change so people will like you.  Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
6. Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
7. Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing.  Every success has a trail of failures behind it, and every failure is leading towards success.  You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
8. Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person and things that are right for us.  We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past.  But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future.  Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
9. Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things we desire are expensive.  But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
10. Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. – If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy in a long-term relationship with anyone else either.  You have to create stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone else.  
11. Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place.  Evaluate situations and take decisive action.  You cannot change what you refuse to confront.  Making progress involves risk.  Period!  You can’t make it to second base with your foot on first.
12. Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises.  Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
13. Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons. – Relationships must be chosen wisely.  It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company.  There’s no need to rush.  If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
14. Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work. – In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet.  Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you.  But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
15. Stop trying to compete against everyone else. – Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you.  Concentrate on beating your own records every day.  Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
16. Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own.  Ask yourself this:  “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”
17. Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. – Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you.  You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough.  But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past.  You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation.  So smile!  Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
18. Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart.  You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate.  Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.”  It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.”  Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself!  And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too.  If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
19. Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
20. Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway.  Just do what you know in your heart is right.
21. Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break. – The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it.  If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.  Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
22. Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. – Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things.  The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
23. Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.
24. Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile.  Don’t take the easy way out.  Do something extraordinary.
25. Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. – It’s okay to fall apart for a little while.  You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well.  You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears.  The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
26. Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you take responsibility for your life.  When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power over that part of your life.
27. Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out.  But making one person smile CAN change the world.  Maybe not the whole world, but their world.  So narrow your focus.
28. Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy.  One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this question: “Will this matter in one year’s time?  Three years?  Five years?”  If not, then it’s not worth worrying about.
29. Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. – Focus on what you do want to happen.  Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story.  If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right.
30. Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life.  Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs.  Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

Photo by: Rob Brucker

Written by marcandangel